The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.
-Dietrich Bonhoeffer
As I was editing Dr. Rob's latest entry, we were talking about how weird the world can be. My senior year of high school I knew a girl who was in a similar situation. We were sitting around drinking one night when she told me that her mom couldn't carry a child to full term. Her mom and step dad wanted to have another child, one that was biologically theirs, I guess. They had asked her if she would consent to being artificially inseminated by her step-father and carry the child to term. Then they'd raise it as her sibling. And all live as a big happy family.
What amazed me then and still amazes me now is that she said yes. She was willing to do it as long as they could wait until after graduation. She didn't want to be pregnant in her graduation pictures and I'm sure she wanted to avoid all the questions that go along with being pregnant your senior year of high school. As I remember it, she had a boyfriend who was okay with this whole plan as well. But then, I remember him having long greasy hair and bad skin and being dumb as a brick so there's no guarantee that he actually understood what his girlfriend had agreed to.
Thinking about it now, I knew what happened to her. If she went through with it. At the time she was almost angrily forward about it when she told people. She had a whole "I love my parents. I'd do anything for them." thing going that almost dared you to say something against it. Like she was just waiting for the chance to show you how much she loved her parents by punching you in the face. Only good parents who respect appropriate boundaries with their children can inspire that kind of love. I did find it curious that she told so many people.
Now I realize that her bravado was all a front. She must have been scared out of her mind. That's why she told so many people, that's why she was so angrily insistent that she was doing the right thing. She was just trying to find a way to deal with it. It must be a horrible thing to be caught in the position she was in. I'm sure she did love her mom and step dad. I'm sure she wanted to make them happy. On the other hand, how do you ask an 18 year old to do such a thing?
I thought about googling her, or stalking her on myspace or maybe classmates.com or something but for the life of me, I can't remember her goddamn name. I've been thinking about it for days and googling "girl who is having her step-dad's baby, senior year of high school" is such a bad idea on so many levels that I'm not going to attempt it.
So if you're out there and reading this mystery girl, the first round is on me. But if you did go through with it, leave the kid at home.
Posted by Ben Corman at 9:18 PM